I’ve got this throat cold that my family has generously shared with me. They are so thoughtful not to have left me out!
I know “throat cold” sounds bizarre, but seriously, there’s a knot of something untoward in my voice box. I began to sound croaky about halfway through teaching my class last night.
But this morning, taking stock of my mildly suffering condition, I decided that being slightly ill makes my life better than being completely healthy.
I know. The logical conclusion then is that I would want to maintain some kind of chronic condition. Which I absolutely DO NOT.
However, when I’m slightly ill, to where there is mild discomfort such as runny nose, cough, maybe a bit of pain, I eat better. I allow myself to rest. I don’t “should” on myself all day long, beating myself over the head with an impossible to-do list. I am able to simply do the best I can and let go of everything else.
After all, I’m “sick.”
Can I take away from this that I need to find a new way to motivate myself? Because damn, I can get a serious amount of crap done. I can run myself ragged, multitask till I’m turning blue and just generally demand, and not politely either, perfection from myself at every moment of the day. And then beat myself soundly when, inevitably, I do not complete every task, or at least not to my impossibly high standards.
Perhaps I could be healthy and not live like that?
Perhaps I could always be “sick,” if by sick I mean that I am an imperfect human who requires TLC and some consideration once in a while. From my own self, even.